His memory of that fateful day is a constant companion: World War II.........Normandy, France, 1944..........an accidental bazooka explosion.........jagged shrapnel tearing into his stomach, arms and legs........the chilling squeeze of death's cold hand.
Should the events of that day 70 years ago ever become clouded by the passage of time, a glance at his right hand, where his pinky used to be, will provide renewed clarity.
Shortly after surviving a mild heart attack a few months ago, 90-year-old Walter F. Thompson''s memories of that day shone clear as he was en route to Carroll's Jewelers in Doylestown. The Army veteran is a member of the often-called greatest generation that sacrificed so much for so many. But on this day, he was about to do something for himself.
Along with his memories, Thompson toted a damaged high school graduation ring to his jeweler ------ the ring he wore on his right hand when that bazooka shell exploded. His pinky was so severely damaged it had to be surgically removed shortly after he was wounded.
The graduation ring from Northeast High School in Philadelphia was severely damaged too, bent out of shape to such a degree that it couldn't be worn. Still, Thompson tucked it into his uniform pocket, took it back to America, put it away and forgot about it.
The passage of time often draws our gaze over our shoulders, to the days when our lives were new and the future was an open highway. And as Thompson's 90th birthday approached, he began thinking about that ring and how much he wanted to wear it again.
"I didn't want to restore my ring to exactly the way it was, but to change it to reflect my Army service," said Thompson, a resident of Ann's Choice, a continuing care retirement community in Warminster. "I wanted to get it re-stylized with the insignia that officers put on their caps ------- a large eagle clutching arrows. I was only an Army staff sergeant, not an officer, but I didn't think anybody would mind. I was doing it to remember my service and to honor my country."
When Thompson visited the jewelry store and handed the damaged ring to Carroll's owner Joel Robinson, the jeweler immediately knew restoring it to the man's specifications would be challenging.
"The ring was damaged and needed to be reworked," Robinson said. "Plus, he wanted a particular insignia."
Thompson described what he wanted, and Robinson said he'd do his best. But the jeweler soon realized the insignia Thompson chose was too large for the ring's stone.
"I told him that if he couldn't find what I was looking for, he shouldn't worry about it. I told him to just fix the ring. But he said, 'Don't worry. It might take some time, but I'll find the insignia for you.'"
Months passed. Thompson hadn't heard a thing. He gave up on the project.
Two weeks ago, Thompson answered his phone. It was the news he was certain he would never hear: Robinson saying his ring was ready to be picked up. The next day, Thompson excitedly walked into the jewelry store. He approached the counter, where a sales clerk handed him the ring. It was just as he had hoped. The look and fit were perfect as he slid it onto his left ring finger.
And then Thompson hanbded the saleswoman his charge card.
"She handed it back to me and said, 'Sir, your bill has been taken care of,'" said Thompson, who celebrates his 90th birthday today. "Then she told me she'd like to read me a note."
The note was from a gentleman who was in the store when Thompson brought the ring in. The man, a regular customer of Carroll's, had overheard Thompson talking about how the ring was damaged during the war. After he left the jeweler, the man went home and thought about doing something nice for Thompson. He phoned the jewelry store and said he wanted to pay for the ring's repair, and asked the clerk to make sure to thank Thompson for his service to our country.
Thompson asked the clerk for the man's phone number because he wanted to call and thank him for his unexpected generosity. The clerk informed Thompson the man wants to remain anonymous.
"That was sure nice of him, but I don't think I did anything special," Thompson said, his voice cracking with emotion over the generosity of a man he doesn't know. "People are always saying thank you for your service. That's nice, but I tell everybody, that back then, we were all eager to serve. We did it for our country. We don't need to be thanked."
There are those of us, anonymous and otherwise, who couldn't disagree more.
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Saturday, April 26, 2014
Stormy tale of two baseball greats
Jackie Robinson and Roy Campanella occupy the pantheon of baseball players who became folk heroes. Their relationship, though, has received little attention, even from writers who knew them best, such as Roger Kahn, author of The Boys of Summer, the definitive book on the late 1940s and 1950s Dodgers. That's because much of the Robinson-Campanella story doesn't show the two Hall of Famers at their best.
William Kashatus, author of the superb September Swoon: Richie Allen, the '64 Phillies and Racial Integration, has taken on a tricky subject and handled it well. He's right to say the book "offers an important corrective to what has become a sanitized retelling of their relationship and its impact on baseball's integration process."
"To be sure," he writes in his introduction, "Robinson and Campanella possessed different personalities that often clashed during their years with the Brooklyn Dodgers. Where Robinson was overly aggressive and intense, Campanella was more passive and easygoing. Jackie's race consciousness and relentless drive were admired by teammates and eventually opponents, but these qualities certainly did not endear him to the white baseball establishment. Conversely, Campy's indefatigable enthusiasm and boyish charm made him one of the game's most popular players."
Campanella grew to be jealous of Robinson's status as the man who broke baseball's color barrier. (Campanella entered the big leagues in 1948, a year after Robinson.) Robinson, in turn, resented Campanella's popularity.
Their backgrounds were a study in contrast. Robinson was born in 1919 and raised in poverty by his mother, a domestic, in Pasadena, Calif. He went on to graduate from UCLA.
Campanella, born in Germantown in 1921 to a Sicilian father and African American mother, grew up in working-class Nicetown. He left high school at age 16 to pursue baseball in the Negro Leagues.
Both were lucky enough to be called up by the Brooklyn Dodgers, whose general manager, Branch Rickey, was determined to integrate baseball. Brooklyn offered just about the best conditions available for black players in the big leagues. As one Brooklynite put it, "The great thing about being a kid in Brooklyn during the 1930s was that it didn't matter what your ethnic background was........... Everybody was the same. Nobody had anything."
Together, Robinson and Campanella led the Dodgers to six pennants from 1947 through 1956, though their styles were markedly different. When a young black pitcher, Don Newcombe, joined the team, Robinson bullied him, "challenging the young pitcher's character in order to motivate him on the mound." Campanella's approach, as Kashatus writes, was the opposite: "Cool and easy, Campy soothed Newk every time and emotionally stroked his confidence, like a balm on a wound."
Campanella's leadership of the Dodgers and his even-tempered personality "endeared him to the white baseball establishment. But those same qualities irked Robinson." But both men, it should be noted, along with other black players in the Brooklyn club, went out of their way to support an 18-year-old pitching phenom named Sandy Koufax, who was bombarded around the league with anti-Semitic taunts.
What could have been a sad story ended on a positive note. In 1964, Robinson, long retired, went to visit his old teammate, who had been in a wheelchair since a 1958 automobile accident while driving back home from his Harlem liquor store. Robinson presented Campanella with an autographed copy of his recently published memoir.
Campanella, Kashatus writes, "greeted Robinson warmly, and they conducted a two-hour discussion on race relations in America.......it became clear to Jackie that the two men now shared the same philosophy, namely that there was no place for segregation, black separatism, or violence in the Civil Rights movement."
Kashatus tells their story with an appreciation of their strengths and weaknesses. Jackie & Campy is no hagiography: "When we idolize them we fail to acknowledge the meaning of their contributions as well as their sacrifices. Neither man would want that."
William Kashatus, author of the superb September Swoon: Richie Allen, the '64 Phillies and Racial Integration, has taken on a tricky subject and handled it well. He's right to say the book "offers an important corrective to what has become a sanitized retelling of their relationship and its impact on baseball's integration process."
"To be sure," he writes in his introduction, "Robinson and Campanella possessed different personalities that often clashed during their years with the Brooklyn Dodgers. Where Robinson was overly aggressive and intense, Campanella was more passive and easygoing. Jackie's race consciousness and relentless drive were admired by teammates and eventually opponents, but these qualities certainly did not endear him to the white baseball establishment. Conversely, Campy's indefatigable enthusiasm and boyish charm made him one of the game's most popular players."
Campanella grew to be jealous of Robinson's status as the man who broke baseball's color barrier. (Campanella entered the big leagues in 1948, a year after Robinson.) Robinson, in turn, resented Campanella's popularity.
Their backgrounds were a study in contrast. Robinson was born in 1919 and raised in poverty by his mother, a domestic, in Pasadena, Calif. He went on to graduate from UCLA.
Campanella, born in Germantown in 1921 to a Sicilian father and African American mother, grew up in working-class Nicetown. He left high school at age 16 to pursue baseball in the Negro Leagues.
Both were lucky enough to be called up by the Brooklyn Dodgers, whose general manager, Branch Rickey, was determined to integrate baseball. Brooklyn offered just about the best conditions available for black players in the big leagues. As one Brooklynite put it, "The great thing about being a kid in Brooklyn during the 1930s was that it didn't matter what your ethnic background was........... Everybody was the same. Nobody had anything."
Together, Robinson and Campanella led the Dodgers to six pennants from 1947 through 1956, though their styles were markedly different. When a young black pitcher, Don Newcombe, joined the team, Robinson bullied him, "challenging the young pitcher's character in order to motivate him on the mound." Campanella's approach, as Kashatus writes, was the opposite: "Cool and easy, Campy soothed Newk every time and emotionally stroked his confidence, like a balm on a wound."
Campanella's leadership of the Dodgers and his even-tempered personality "endeared him to the white baseball establishment. But those same qualities irked Robinson." But both men, it should be noted, along with other black players in the Brooklyn club, went out of their way to support an 18-year-old pitching phenom named Sandy Koufax, who was bombarded around the league with anti-Semitic taunts.
What could have been a sad story ended on a positive note. In 1964, Robinson, long retired, went to visit his old teammate, who had been in a wheelchair since a 1958 automobile accident while driving back home from his Harlem liquor store. Robinson presented Campanella with an autographed copy of his recently published memoir.
Campanella, Kashatus writes, "greeted Robinson warmly, and they conducted a two-hour discussion on race relations in America.......it became clear to Jackie that the two men now shared the same philosophy, namely that there was no place for segregation, black separatism, or violence in the Civil Rights movement."
Kashatus tells their story with an appreciation of their strengths and weaknesses. Jackie & Campy is no hagiography: "When we idolize them we fail to acknowledge the meaning of their contributions as well as their sacrifices. Neither man would want that."
Kennections
All five correct answers have something in common.
Can you figure out what it is?
1. What national emblem of Canada is also an official animal of the state of Oregon?
2. In 1936, John McCain was born in the Canal Zone, a U.S. territory that today belongs to what country?
3. What type of horse race for three-year-olds is named for an event held annually at Epsom Downs in Surrey, England since 1780?
4. What was the name of Wilmer Valderrama's exchange student character on That '70s Show?
5. What do the British call the part of a car that Americans call the "hood"?
Bonus : What's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Beaver
2. Panama
3. Derby
4. Fez
5. Bonnet
Bonus : All are types of Hat
Can you figure out what it is?
1. What national emblem of Canada is also an official animal of the state of Oregon?
2. In 1936, John McCain was born in the Canal Zone, a U.S. territory that today belongs to what country?
3. What type of horse race for three-year-olds is named for an event held annually at Epsom Downs in Surrey, England since 1780?
4. What was the name of Wilmer Valderrama's exchange student character on That '70s Show?
5. What do the British call the part of a car that Americans call the "hood"?
Bonus : What's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Beaver
2. Panama
3. Derby
4. Fez
5. Bonnet
Bonus : All are types of Hat
Thanks for a good deed: Just pass it on
Dear Abby : It seems strange to write to you, but I'd like to share this stoy about how small acts of kindness can multiply.
On a dark, miserable afternoon, I was out grocery shopping. The woman in line in front of me had two small children and two full carts of groceries. When all her bags were loaded, she began frantically searching in her purse for her car keys. When she couldn't find them, she realized that, in her haste, she had locked them inside her car. I asked if I could drive her home to get a spare key and she agreed.
I helped her into her house with her bags of groceries, then drove them all back to the store for her car. "How can I ever thank you?" she asked. My reply was, "No thanks are needed; just pass it on."
Two weeks later, I was at a party when a couple walked into the living room and the woman excitedly said, "There she is!" It was the woman from the market. She rushed over and proceeded to tell everyone how we met.
Then she said she'd had her chance to "pass it on." I asked what she told the person who had thanked her, and she said, "I said what you did: 'No thanks are needed ----- pass it on!"
Small kindnesses bring big rewards. If anyone has been the recipient of an act of kindness, remember to pass it on. It's the Golden Rule.
Thanks, Dear Abby ----- you "pass on" kindness with each column you write.
---Living the Golden Rule
Dear Living The Golden Rule : I am a firm believer in passing it on and have long shared that philosophy with friends. However, regardless of how long you preach, the best sermon is a good example.
On a dark, miserable afternoon, I was out grocery shopping. The woman in line in front of me had two small children and two full carts of groceries. When all her bags were loaded, she began frantically searching in her purse for her car keys. When she couldn't find them, she realized that, in her haste, she had locked them inside her car. I asked if I could drive her home to get a spare key and she agreed.
I helped her into her house with her bags of groceries, then drove them all back to the store for her car. "How can I ever thank you?" she asked. My reply was, "No thanks are needed; just pass it on."
Two weeks later, I was at a party when a couple walked into the living room and the woman excitedly said, "There she is!" It was the woman from the market. She rushed over and proceeded to tell everyone how we met.
Then she said she'd had her chance to "pass it on." I asked what she told the person who had thanked her, and she said, "I said what you did: 'No thanks are needed ----- pass it on!"
Small kindnesses bring big rewards. If anyone has been the recipient of an act of kindness, remember to pass it on. It's the Golden Rule.
Thanks, Dear Abby ----- you "pass on" kindness with each column you write.
---Living the Golden Rule
Dear Living The Golden Rule : I am a firm believer in passing it on and have long shared that philosophy with friends. However, regardless of how long you preach, the best sermon is a good example.
Weird News
They won't be able to do the Dew
Orlando, Fla. --------- Students in one Central Florida school this year will try to ace high-stakes standardized tests without their usual shot of Mountain Dew.
The change came after a grandmother called local media to complain about a long-standing pretest energy snack offered to students at Creel Elementary in Melbourne consisting of a sip of soda and some trail mix. Students instead will get water with the trail mix, Brevard County School District spokeswoman Michelle Irwin said.
Many Florida schools provide students free snacks or meals on days when the Florida Comprehensive Assessment Tests are administered. Peppermints, which are believed to help with concentration, are particularly popular at many schools. Creel Elementary School Principal Kathryn Edward did not return a call for comment. For 10 years, she had been giving her students 3 tablespoons of Mountain Dew in a cup and some trail mix.
Bring on the ketchup
Waterville, Maine -------- A tractor-trailer carrying 40,000 pounds of french fries caught fire in a Wal-Mart parking lot in the Maine city of Waterville.
The city's fire chief said overheated brakes were the suspected cause of the late-night blaze in the middle of the busy parking lot. The driver said he pulled over when he smelled smoke from the back of the truck. The Portland Press Herald reported that nobody was injured in the fire.
The driver was on his way from the Canadian province of Prince Edward Island to New Jersey to deliver the fries.
Speaking of potatoes........
Providence, R.I. ------------ A man used a potato to pretend he had a gun while trying to rob a Rhode Island business, police said.
WPRI-TV reported that the man entered a convenience store with a potato and shouted : "Give me the money." A police report said the store manager chased him off with a baseball bat. Officers later went to a laundromat, where an employee told them a man fitting the description came in carrying a potato and yelled : "I need the money."
The TV station reported that the employee gave the man a $20 bill from a decoy cash register and he left.
That's just cruel
Cleveland ---------- A woman caught on an Ohio cemetery surveillance video taking a toy duck off the grave of a 14-month-old boy has been charged with petty theft, police said.
Police in Ontario, Ohio, had tried for nearly two years to capture a clear image of someone who was taking mementos from the boy's grave. They finally got that image and posted it to Facebook.
Thousands of comments came in on the video showing a woman leaving the gravesite with a stuffed duck that had been placed there just hours before by the toddler's parents. Some of the posts identified the woman as Frieda Kay Shade, 54, Ontario police Detective Jon Sigler said.
Orlando, Fla. --------- Students in one Central Florida school this year will try to ace high-stakes standardized tests without their usual shot of Mountain Dew.
The change came after a grandmother called local media to complain about a long-standing pretest energy snack offered to students at Creel Elementary in Melbourne consisting of a sip of soda and some trail mix. Students instead will get water with the trail mix, Brevard County School District spokeswoman Michelle Irwin said.
Many Florida schools provide students free snacks or meals on days when the Florida Comprehensive Assessment Tests are administered. Peppermints, which are believed to help with concentration, are particularly popular at many schools. Creel Elementary School Principal Kathryn Edward did not return a call for comment. For 10 years, she had been giving her students 3 tablespoons of Mountain Dew in a cup and some trail mix.
Bring on the ketchup
Waterville, Maine -------- A tractor-trailer carrying 40,000 pounds of french fries caught fire in a Wal-Mart parking lot in the Maine city of Waterville.
The city's fire chief said overheated brakes were the suspected cause of the late-night blaze in the middle of the busy parking lot. The driver said he pulled over when he smelled smoke from the back of the truck. The Portland Press Herald reported that nobody was injured in the fire.
The driver was on his way from the Canadian province of Prince Edward Island to New Jersey to deliver the fries.
Speaking of potatoes........
Providence, R.I. ------------ A man used a potato to pretend he had a gun while trying to rob a Rhode Island business, police said.
WPRI-TV reported that the man entered a convenience store with a potato and shouted : "Give me the money." A police report said the store manager chased him off with a baseball bat. Officers later went to a laundromat, where an employee told them a man fitting the description came in carrying a potato and yelled : "I need the money."
The TV station reported that the employee gave the man a $20 bill from a decoy cash register and he left.
That's just cruel
Cleveland ---------- A woman caught on an Ohio cemetery surveillance video taking a toy duck off the grave of a 14-month-old boy has been charged with petty theft, police said.
Police in Ontario, Ohio, had tried for nearly two years to capture a clear image of someone who was taking mementos from the boy's grave. They finally got that image and posted it to Facebook.
Thousands of comments came in on the video showing a woman leaving the gravesite with a stuffed duck that had been placed there just hours before by the toddler's parents. Some of the posts identified the woman as Frieda Kay Shade, 54, Ontario police Detective Jon Sigler said.
Thursday, April 24, 2014
A red moon in the night sky
If the night sky is clear very early on Tuesday morning, we will be able to watch a total lunar eclipse, as the full moon moves into the Earth's shadow.
The first easily visible change in the moon's appearance will occur at 1:58 a.m., marking the start of the partial eclipse phase of the moon. About an hour earlier, the moon will begin to dim very slightly as it enters the outer and far less dark region of the Earth's shadow known as the penumbra. The penumbral eclipse phase is not very noticeable because the Earth does not block out all of the direct sunlight reaching the moon.
At the beginning of the partial eclipse, the full moon just begins to entire the darker part of the Earth's shadow known as the umbra. Imagine the moon as a "cookie" in the sky with a bite being taken out of its left side as a it slowly advances into the dark umbra. The bite grows bigger and bigger until the moon is totally within the umbra, and that marks the beginning of the total eclipse at 3:06 a.m.
As a result of a tilt in the moon's orbit, every month the full moon usually passes slightly above or below the Earth's shadow, so we don't see an eclipse every month. This month, the full moon, the Earth and the sun line up to give us a total lunar eclipse.
During totality, from the moon's point of view, the sun is completely blocked by the Earth, preventing any direct light from the sun reaching the moon. But why during totality doesn't the moon appear black and disappear? Because scattered sunlight, which we see as a red sky before sunrise and after sunset, can trickle through our atmosphere around the edge of the Earth and dimly light the moon with interesting copper-to-reddish colors.
The Chinese lunar exploration spacecraft Chang'e 3 is now on the moon. If it can look toward the Earth during totality, it will see a dark circular Earth completely hiding the sun, with the Earth enclosed in a bright shining ring of red light from all of our planet's red skies at sunset and sunrise.
While eclipsed, the moon's dark shading varies considerably from eclipse to eclipse because its passage through the umbra is sometimes a bull's-eye and at other times, such as in this month, it passes through the outer portion of the umbra. Our atmosphere's ozone content can offer a glimpse of a blue color at the edge of a totally eclipsed moon.
The middle of the eclipse will occur at 3:45 am. The total eclipse ends at 4:24a.m., followed by the moon growing back to its normal appearance during the partial phase of the eclipse. That ends at 5:33 a.m., making the "cookie" whole again. About an hour later, the moon leaves the penumbra part of the Earth's shadow.
If you miss this total lunar eclipse, the next one, which will also be visible from our area, occurs in the later morning hours of Oct.8. Another one occurs even later in the morning of April 4, 2015. But the full totality duration of these eclipses cannot be seen from our area because the moon sets before totality ends.
The first easily visible change in the moon's appearance will occur at 1:58 a.m., marking the start of the partial eclipse phase of the moon. About an hour earlier, the moon will begin to dim very slightly as it enters the outer and far less dark region of the Earth's shadow known as the penumbra. The penumbral eclipse phase is not very noticeable because the Earth does not block out all of the direct sunlight reaching the moon.
At the beginning of the partial eclipse, the full moon just begins to entire the darker part of the Earth's shadow known as the umbra. Imagine the moon as a "cookie" in the sky with a bite being taken out of its left side as a it slowly advances into the dark umbra. The bite grows bigger and bigger until the moon is totally within the umbra, and that marks the beginning of the total eclipse at 3:06 a.m.
As a result of a tilt in the moon's orbit, every month the full moon usually passes slightly above or below the Earth's shadow, so we don't see an eclipse every month. This month, the full moon, the Earth and the sun line up to give us a total lunar eclipse.
During totality, from the moon's point of view, the sun is completely blocked by the Earth, preventing any direct light from the sun reaching the moon. But why during totality doesn't the moon appear black and disappear? Because scattered sunlight, which we see as a red sky before sunrise and after sunset, can trickle through our atmosphere around the edge of the Earth and dimly light the moon with interesting copper-to-reddish colors.
The Chinese lunar exploration spacecraft Chang'e 3 is now on the moon. If it can look toward the Earth during totality, it will see a dark circular Earth completely hiding the sun, with the Earth enclosed in a bright shining ring of red light from all of our planet's red skies at sunset and sunrise.
While eclipsed, the moon's dark shading varies considerably from eclipse to eclipse because its passage through the umbra is sometimes a bull's-eye and at other times, such as in this month, it passes through the outer portion of the umbra. Our atmosphere's ozone content can offer a glimpse of a blue color at the edge of a totally eclipsed moon.
The middle of the eclipse will occur at 3:45 am. The total eclipse ends at 4:24a.m., followed by the moon growing back to its normal appearance during the partial phase of the eclipse. That ends at 5:33 a.m., making the "cookie" whole again. About an hour later, the moon leaves the penumbra part of the Earth's shadow.
If you miss this total lunar eclipse, the next one, which will also be visible from our area, occurs in the later morning hours of Oct.8. Another one occurs even later in the morning of April 4, 2015. But the full totality duration of these eclipses cannot be seen from our area because the moon sets before totality ends.
2014's 'Easter psyche'
Jesus had a wife. Or maybe not.
Whatever. It makes a good story, which is why it is this year's "Easter psyche."
"Easter psyche" is splashy coverage of a trend, controversial book, scandal or archaeological "discovery" that aims to debunk something about Jesus or his followers. Usually, its aim is to contradict the basis of the faith as Christians prepare for the holiest day on their liturgical calendar.
The "Easter psyche" appears each spring, and its unique fragrance pervades the holiday week like dead skunk on a suburban highway.
The modern secular tradition of skunking Easter began on Good Friday, April 8, 1966, when Time magazine published its most famous cover, "Is God Dead?" (Time's conclusion: Depends on whom you ask.)
This trend continued, ramping up in the early 1990s as the tradition was refined, as outlets completed to created the most buzz-worthy psyche story.
Some highlights :
On Holy Thursday 1991, Larry King, then hosting a prime-time interview show on CNN, looked into the camera and asked viewers: "Was Saint Paul a repressed homosexual? Mother Mary not a virgin?"
The next year, wide press coverage was given during Lent to ex-priest John Dominic Crossan's book claiming the Jesus was nothing more than a kindly man with nice ideas, and that his body was not resurrected but probably eaten by wild dogs.
On Easter Sunday 2001, the Discovery Channel broadcast a three-hour British documentary "Jesus: The Complete Story," which presented Jesus as historical, not divine, and suggested he conspired with Judas to turn himself over to the authorities who put him to death.
In 2003, Discovery was back with another Easter Sunday special, "James, Brother of Jesus" claiming that James, not Jesus, was the real leader of the Church.
During Lent 2007, "Titanic" director James Cameron produced "The Lost Tomb of Jesus" documentary, which claimed to have discovered Jesus' family burial chamber in East Jerusalem, called the Talpiot Tomb. Amos Kloner, the renowned archaeologist who actually led the Israel Antiquities Authority's excavation of the tomb in 1980, said the Cameron documentary's claims are "nonsense."
And then there was Newsweek's Easter 2009 cover by editor Jon Meacham, a reprise of Time's "Is God Dead?" cover ------ "The Decline and Fall of Christian America."
In 2010, there was wall-to-wall Holy Week coverage by the networks of the Catholic clergy sex scandal. On April 3, Holy Saturday to Christians, NBC News reporter Dan Harris said: "This is the holiest weekend in the Christian calendar ....... but Easter is providing no respite whatsoever from what may be the gravest outrage in the modern history of the Catholic Church."
Harris returned the next day to psyche: "On this Easter Sunday an extraordinary effort to defend the pope amid growing public outrage over pedophile priests........."
Last year, Newsweek's Easter cover bore the words "Forget the Church, Follow Jesus" by the gay marriage activist and writer Andrew Sullivan.
This year's Easter psyche came last week, when experts concluded that a scrap of papyrus purporting to show Jesus had a wife probably dates to about 741 AD, and is not a modern forgery as some scholars believe.
The scrap was first presented to the public in September 2012 by its discoverer, Harvard Divinity School historian Karen L. King. It contains words in Coptic, "Jesus said to them, "My wife.....'" That's where the sentence ends, conveniently.
According to The New York Times, even Professor King is reluctant to say Jesus had a wife.
Jesus did not have a wife. Would it matter if he did?
No. If you do not understand why, maybe you have read too much John Dominic Crossan, Jon Meacham, Andrew Sullivan, et al, or have watched too many hokey television documentaries.
Whatever. It makes a good story, which is why it is this year's "Easter psyche."
"Easter psyche" is splashy coverage of a trend, controversial book, scandal or archaeological "discovery" that aims to debunk something about Jesus or his followers. Usually, its aim is to contradict the basis of the faith as Christians prepare for the holiest day on their liturgical calendar.
The "Easter psyche" appears each spring, and its unique fragrance pervades the holiday week like dead skunk on a suburban highway.
The modern secular tradition of skunking Easter began on Good Friday, April 8, 1966, when Time magazine published its most famous cover, "Is God Dead?" (Time's conclusion: Depends on whom you ask.)
This trend continued, ramping up in the early 1990s as the tradition was refined, as outlets completed to created the most buzz-worthy psyche story.
Some highlights :
On Holy Thursday 1991, Larry King, then hosting a prime-time interview show on CNN, looked into the camera and asked viewers: "Was Saint Paul a repressed homosexual? Mother Mary not a virgin?"
The next year, wide press coverage was given during Lent to ex-priest John Dominic Crossan's book claiming the Jesus was nothing more than a kindly man with nice ideas, and that his body was not resurrected but probably eaten by wild dogs.
On Easter Sunday 2001, the Discovery Channel broadcast a three-hour British documentary "Jesus: The Complete Story," which presented Jesus as historical, not divine, and suggested he conspired with Judas to turn himself over to the authorities who put him to death.
In 2003, Discovery was back with another Easter Sunday special, "James, Brother of Jesus" claiming that James, not Jesus, was the real leader of the Church.
During Lent 2007, "Titanic" director James Cameron produced "The Lost Tomb of Jesus" documentary, which claimed to have discovered Jesus' family burial chamber in East Jerusalem, called the Talpiot Tomb. Amos Kloner, the renowned archaeologist who actually led the Israel Antiquities Authority's excavation of the tomb in 1980, said the Cameron documentary's claims are "nonsense."
And then there was Newsweek's Easter 2009 cover by editor Jon Meacham, a reprise of Time's "Is God Dead?" cover ------ "The Decline and Fall of Christian America."
In 2010, there was wall-to-wall Holy Week coverage by the networks of the Catholic clergy sex scandal. On April 3, Holy Saturday to Christians, NBC News reporter Dan Harris said: "This is the holiest weekend in the Christian calendar ....... but Easter is providing no respite whatsoever from what may be the gravest outrage in the modern history of the Catholic Church."
Harris returned the next day to psyche: "On this Easter Sunday an extraordinary effort to defend the pope amid growing public outrage over pedophile priests........."
Last year, Newsweek's Easter cover bore the words "Forget the Church, Follow Jesus" by the gay marriage activist and writer Andrew Sullivan.
This year's Easter psyche came last week, when experts concluded that a scrap of papyrus purporting to show Jesus had a wife probably dates to about 741 AD, and is not a modern forgery as some scholars believe.
The scrap was first presented to the public in September 2012 by its discoverer, Harvard Divinity School historian Karen L. King. It contains words in Coptic, "Jesus said to them, "My wife.....'" That's where the sentence ends, conveniently.
According to The New York Times, even Professor King is reluctant to say Jesus had a wife.
Jesus did not have a wife. Would it matter if he did?
No. If you do not understand why, maybe you have read too much John Dominic Crossan, Jon Meacham, Andrew Sullivan, et al, or have watched too many hokey television documentaries.
Wednesday, April 23, 2014
Great Hoaxes
Of the last 50 Years
- Left-Handed Whopper --- On April 1, 1998, Burger King published a full-page ad in USA Today introducing the Left-Handed Whopper, specially designed for the 32 million left-handed Americans. The ingredients were the same but the condiments were rotated 180 degrees to aid left-handed customers. Thousands of burger eaters requested the sandwich.
- Hitler Hype ------ In April 1983, the German magazine Stern announced a stunning discovery: the handwritten diaries of Adolf Hitler, which would shed new light on his life and the Third Reich. Handwriting experts hired by the Sunday Times of London and Newsweek pronounced them authentic. But soon after publication, the diaries were declared fakes,full of historical inaccuracies. They were soon linked to a notorious forger.
- Pierre Brassau -------- In February 1964, a previously unknown French artist, Pierre Brassau, earned lavish praise when his work was exhibited at a Swedish art show. " [He] paints with powerful strokes. Pierre is an artist who performs with the delicacy of a ballet dancer," one critic said. A lone reviewer said that the works could have been painted by an ape. He was right; "Pierre Brassau" was an alias for Peter, a 4-year-old chimpanzee from the zoo.
- A False Note ------- The Oct. 18, 1969, issue of Rolling Stone magazine published a satirical review of a new album featuring Mick Jagger, Bob Dylan, John Lennon, Paul McCartney and George Harrison as the band the Masked Marauders. The critic gushed that the collaboration "is more than a way of life; it is life." Fever for the album, and its tunes like "Cow Pie" and "I Can't Get No Nookie," soared until the hoax was revealed.
- Hidden Ball Trick --------- In 1985, Sports Illustrated published a story about the Mets rookie Sidd Finch, who could throw a baseball at an unbelievable 168 mph, 65 mph faster than the standing record, a craft he perfected at a Tibetan monastery, George Plimpton's article reported: "He's a pitcher, part yogi and part recluse. Impressively liberated from our opulent lifestyle, Sidd's deciding about yoga ---- and his future in baseball." Sharp readers would notice that the first letter of each word spelled out "Happy April Fools' Day."
- Bogus Billionaire Bio -------- In 1971, eccentric billionaire Howard Hughes no longer appeared in public, so writer Clifford Irving figured he was safe to claim to have ghost-written Hughes' authorized autobiography. Irving received almost $1 million for the book rights. But before publication Hughes broke his silence and denounced the hoax. Irving eventually published an account about how he almost got away with the con.
How Wrigley Field Got Its Ivy
George F. Will is as eloquent on baseball as he is on politics. In his March book, A Nice Little Place on the North Side, out in time for Major League Baseball's opening day, he celebrates the 100th anniversary of Wrigley Field. Here, an excerpt on how Wrigley got its famous Boston ivy.
Pursuant to [Cubs owner William] Wrigley's plan to have a beautiful setting for ugly baseball, [Bill] Veeck [whose father was Cubs president] suggested that they borrow an idea from Perry Stadium, in Indianapolis, where ivy adorned the outfield walls. Wrigley responded enthusiastically, "And we can put trees or something in the back." Except he did not want the trees outside the park; he wanted them in the bleachers. And although Wrigley seems to have had too much patience when trying, sort of, to grow a good team, he did not want to wait for saplings to grow big enough to shade the steps leading up to the scoreboard. So tree boxes large enough for full-grown trees were built on each step. These required concrete footings, which, in turn, required new steel supports for the bleachers, to withstand the weight. The trees were planted and, Veeck recalled, "a week after we were finished the bleachers looked like the Russian steppes during a hard, cold winter. Nothing but cement and bark." The wind off Lake Michigan had stripped the leaves from the trees. So new trees were planted. And the wind again denuded them. The forestation of the Wrigley Field bleachers was abandoned. The footings for the trees had cost $200,000. That year, 1937, the Cubs' team payroll was about $250,000.
The day before the team returned from a long road trip, Wrigley told Veeck he had invited some friends to the next day's game to see the ivy. But Veeck had not yet bought it. A specialist at a nursery was consulted. He said ivy could not be deployed in one night. Veeck asked what could be. The specialist answered with one word: "Bittersweet." He was not a philosophic merchant commenting on the human condition; neither was he summing up the experience of being a Cubs fan. Rather, he was recommending a plant with that name. So that night Veeck and Wrigley Field's groundskeeper strung light bulbs along the outfield wall to illuminate their work, and by morning the wall was entirely covered with bittersweet. In its midst they planted ivy, which eventually took over the wall.
Pursuant to [Cubs owner William] Wrigley's plan to have a beautiful setting for ugly baseball, [Bill] Veeck [whose father was Cubs president] suggested that they borrow an idea from Perry Stadium, in Indianapolis, where ivy adorned the outfield walls. Wrigley responded enthusiastically, "And we can put trees or something in the back." Except he did not want the trees outside the park; he wanted them in the bleachers. And although Wrigley seems to have had too much patience when trying, sort of, to grow a good team, he did not want to wait for saplings to grow big enough to shade the steps leading up to the scoreboard. So tree boxes large enough for full-grown trees were built on each step. These required concrete footings, which, in turn, required new steel supports for the bleachers, to withstand the weight. The trees were planted and, Veeck recalled, "a week after we were finished the bleachers looked like the Russian steppes during a hard, cold winter. Nothing but cement and bark." The wind off Lake Michigan had stripped the leaves from the trees. So new trees were planted. And the wind again denuded them. The forestation of the Wrigley Field bleachers was abandoned. The footings for the trees had cost $200,000. That year, 1937, the Cubs' team payroll was about $250,000.
The day before the team returned from a long road trip, Wrigley told Veeck he had invited some friends to the next day's game to see the ivy. But Veeck had not yet bought it. A specialist at a nursery was consulted. He said ivy could not be deployed in one night. Veeck asked what could be. The specialist answered with one word: "Bittersweet." He was not a philosophic merchant commenting on the human condition; neither was he summing up the experience of being a Cubs fan. Rather, he was recommending a plant with that name. So that night Veeck and Wrigley Field's groundskeeper strung light bulbs along the outfield wall to illuminate their work, and by morning the wall was entirely covered with bittersweet. In its midst they planted ivy, which eventually took over the wall.
A Boomer's History of the 1964 World's Fair
The 1964 New York World's Fair, which opened in April, was a sprawling showcase of midcentury American culture and technology. Although nearly 52 million people attended the fair, it was a huge financial flop, returning only 19 cents on the dollar to investors. Some World's Fair trivia:
- The star attraction of the Vatican Pavillion was Michelangelo's Pieta.
- Most popular exhibit: GM's Futurama, which mesmerized nearly 26 million vistors with 3-D scenes of the "World of Tomorrow."
- Top-grossing commercial pavillion: reportedly "Bourbon Street," with go-go dancer Candy Johnson headlining at the Gay New Orleans Nightclub.
- In their fifth season on TV in 1965, the Flintstones visited the fair using a time machine.
- Little-known exhibit: a scale model of the World Trade Center planned for lower Manhattan.
- Walt Disney's "audio-animatronic" Abraham Lincoln had more than 250,000 combinations of facial expressions, gestures and other actions.
- The fair's Unisphere icon, a 12-story, stainless-steel model of the Earth, was "destroyed" in the 1997 film Men in Black.
Who Was Billy the Kid?
At least six actors have portrayed the legendary Billy the Kid in Hollywood Westerns.
See how many you can match with the various movie titles.
1. Paul Newman A) The Outlaw
2. Kris Kristofferson B) Billy the Kid
3. Johnny Mack Brown C) The Kid From Texas
4. Roy Rogers D) Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid
5. Audie Murphy E) The Left-Handed Gun
6. Jack Buetel F) Billy the Kid Returns
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. E ; 2. D ; 3. B ; 4. F ; 5. C ; 6. A
See how many you can match with the various movie titles.
1. Paul Newman A) The Outlaw
2. Kris Kristofferson B) Billy the Kid
3. Johnny Mack Brown C) The Kid From Texas
4. Roy Rogers D) Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid
5. Audie Murphy E) The Left-Handed Gun
6. Jack Buetel F) Billy the Kid Returns
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. E ; 2. D ; 3. B ; 4. F ; 5. C ; 6. A
F. Y. I.
On Origins
The first Earth Day was celebrated in America on April 22, 1970, with 20 million people taking to the streets to protest the industrial revolution.
By the Numbers
Tropical rainforests only cover about 6 percent of the Earth's surface but are home to more than half the world's total plant and animal species.
Quotable
by Iris Murdoch, British author and philosopher (1919-1999)
"People from a planet without flowers would think we must be mad with joy the whole time to have such things about us."
Prime Coverage
The Pacific Ocean, the world's largest water body, occupies a third of the Earth's surface.
The first Earth Day was celebrated in America on April 22, 1970, with 20 million people taking to the streets to protest the industrial revolution.
By the Numbers
Tropical rainforests only cover about 6 percent of the Earth's surface but are home to more than half the world's total plant and animal species.
Quotable
by Iris Murdoch, British author and philosopher (1919-1999)
"People from a planet without flowers would think we must be mad with joy the whole time to have such things about us."
Prime Coverage
The Pacific Ocean, the world's largest water body, occupies a third of the Earth's surface.
Sunday, April 20, 2014
Take a 'realme,' not a selfie
By Samantha Mineroff
Central Bucks West High School
Do celebrities look at all the pictures of themselves online? And if they do, what do they see?
Themselves? Their fake selves? Their hidden selves? Or do they not look at all?
Don't we all have a fake self that puts on a model-looking, structured and uncomfortable pose, with either a rehearsed smile or a dramatic, perfectly aligned expression?
We do. They're called "selfies."
So much more goes into making a selfie than one thinks. Some start by taking a shower, spending hours on their hair and makeup, then finding the "right" pose that will make them look slim/cute/sexy/perfect/longing/innocent.
Even after snapping the picture, more wasted time goes into picking and choosing filters that will even out skin tone or brighten the eyes or highlight cheekbones. Then comes the ever-clever captions for people to be awed by, and the hashtags so more people can make a fuss.
Then what? The viewers are obliged to "like" your picture and all your beauty or whatever it is, even though the only thing anyone is really seeing is a covered-up form of yourself.
It's not a selfie. It's a "fakeme," where you arethe center of a painted-over picture.
If you're going to take a snapshot of yourself, take one when you're actually happy and not trying to tell yourself you're "x" --------- and usually that means when you're spending time with people who make you feel happy.
So then, it's not really a selfie at all. It's a "realme," with you in a happy, natural state with people who have helped make you who you are, which isn't just one person. It's someone who loves and cares about others, who reflects others, who learns from others and picks up mannerisms from others.
You, who you are, is more than just you. It's the people you choose to be around, who reflect your character and show what you are a part of.
Why would anyone want to look at someone who only cares about him or herself?
Central Bucks West High School
Do celebrities look at all the pictures of themselves online? And if they do, what do they see?
Themselves? Their fake selves? Their hidden selves? Or do they not look at all?
Don't we all have a fake self that puts on a model-looking, structured and uncomfortable pose, with either a rehearsed smile or a dramatic, perfectly aligned expression?
We do. They're called "selfies."
So much more goes into making a selfie than one thinks. Some start by taking a shower, spending hours on their hair and makeup, then finding the "right" pose that will make them look slim/cute/sexy/perfect/longing/innocent.
Even after snapping the picture, more wasted time goes into picking and choosing filters that will even out skin tone or brighten the eyes or highlight cheekbones. Then comes the ever-clever captions for people to be awed by, and the hashtags so more people can make a fuss.
Then what? The viewers are obliged to "like" your picture and all your beauty or whatever it is, even though the only thing anyone is really seeing is a covered-up form of yourself.
It's not a selfie. It's a "fakeme," where you arethe center of a painted-over picture.
If you're going to take a snapshot of yourself, take one when you're actually happy and not trying to tell yourself you're "x" --------- and usually that means when you're spending time with people who make you feel happy.
So then, it's not really a selfie at all. It's a "realme," with you in a happy, natural state with people who have helped make you who you are, which isn't just one person. It's someone who loves and cares about others, who reflects others, who learns from others and picks up mannerisms from others.
You, who you are, is more than just you. It's the people you choose to be around, who reflect your character and show what you are a part of.
Why would anyone want to look at someone who only cares about him or herself?
Saturday, April 19, 2014
Kennections
All five correct answers have something in common.
Can you figure out what it is?
1. The first Ali-Frazier fight took place at what famous New York arena?
2. What did the Wright Brothers sell in their Dayton shop before getting into aviation?
3. Paul Newman made his Broadway debut in what Pulitzer-winning William Inge play about a Labor Day get-together?
4. What brings James Franco from Kansas to Oz in the movie Oz the Great and Powerful?
5. The TV special Here Comes Peter Cottontail ends when Peter takes over what important springtime role?
Bonus : What 's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Madison Square Garden
2. Bicycles
3. Picnic
4. Hot Air Balloon
5. The Easter Bunny
Bonus : All have baskets
Can you figure out what it is?
1. The first Ali-Frazier fight took place at what famous New York arena?
2. What did the Wright Brothers sell in their Dayton shop before getting into aviation?
3. Paul Newman made his Broadway debut in what Pulitzer-winning William Inge play about a Labor Day get-together?
4. What brings James Franco from Kansas to Oz in the movie Oz the Great and Powerful?
5. The TV special Here Comes Peter Cottontail ends when Peter takes over what important springtime role?
Bonus : What 's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Madison Square Garden
2. Bicycles
3. Picnic
4. Hot Air Balloon
5. The Easter Bunny
Bonus : All have baskets
What's Your Pooch I. Q.?
How much do you know about dogs? Take this quiz and find out. Feel free to consult your dog if you're not sure.
1. Chasing cars, skateboards or other fast-moving objects is a form of what type of behavior?
a) social
b) predatory
c) territorial
d) both b & c
2. Dogs wag their tails when they are feeling which of the following emotions?
a) happiness
b) curiosity
c) aggression
d) all of the above
3. Which of the following is not a reason that dogs mark territory with urine?
a) to indicate sexual availability
b) to warn other dogs off their territory
c) to get back at their owners for leaving them alone
d) to express their superiority to other dogs
4. Which number does not indicate a dog's normal body temperature?
a) 99 degrees F
b) 100 degrees F
c) 101.5 degrees F
d) 102 degrees F
5. Whiskers aid which of a dog's senses?
a) touch
b) sight
c) hearing
d) both a & b
6. Which of the following dog breeds is hypoallergenic?
a) poodle
b) soft-coated wheaten terrier
c) greyhound
d) none of the above
7. "Coprophagy" is a term used to describe which behavior?
a) dogs who eat coffeecake
b) dogs who chase police officers
c) dogs who eat poop
d) dogs who dig for fossils
8. Which of the following terms has not been used to describe canine vocalizations?
a) the bells of Moscow
b) chop
c) big bawl mouth
d) trill
9. Which of these is not a reason that dogs dig?
a) to hide food for later use
b) to plant their own strawberries and tomatoes
c) to make a comfy bed
d) to find prey
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. (d) Dogs react to territorial incursions by chasing the invader
2. (d) A dog's tail wag can mean many different things, depending on the tail's position and the speed at which it's moving
3. (c) Dogs with separation anxiety may urine-mark because they are nervous, but they aren't capable of complex emotions such as spite
4. (a) A dog's normal temperature ranges from `100 degrees F to 102.5 degrees F
5. (d) Whiskers enhance a dog's senses of sight and touch by detecting air currents, sensing obstacles that might otherwise go unseen in the dark and transmitting information about an object's shape and texture
6. (d) All dog's, even hairless breeds, have allergens in their dander (dead skin cells), saliva and urine
7. (c) &
8. (d) A trill is more often attributed to cats
9. (b) The only planting dog's do is of bones
1. Chasing cars, skateboards or other fast-moving objects is a form of what type of behavior?
a) social
b) predatory
c) territorial
d) both b & c
2. Dogs wag their tails when they are feeling which of the following emotions?
a) happiness
b) curiosity
c) aggression
d) all of the above
3. Which of the following is not a reason that dogs mark territory with urine?
a) to indicate sexual availability
b) to warn other dogs off their territory
c) to get back at their owners for leaving them alone
d) to express their superiority to other dogs
4. Which number does not indicate a dog's normal body temperature?
a) 99 degrees F
b) 100 degrees F
c) 101.5 degrees F
d) 102 degrees F
5. Whiskers aid which of a dog's senses?
a) touch
b) sight
c) hearing
d) both a & b
6. Which of the following dog breeds is hypoallergenic?
a) poodle
b) soft-coated wheaten terrier
c) greyhound
d) none of the above
7. "Coprophagy" is a term used to describe which behavior?
a) dogs who eat coffeecake
b) dogs who chase police officers
c) dogs who eat poop
d) dogs who dig for fossils
8. Which of the following terms has not been used to describe canine vocalizations?
a) the bells of Moscow
b) chop
c) big bawl mouth
d) trill
9. Which of these is not a reason that dogs dig?
a) to hide food for later use
b) to plant their own strawberries and tomatoes
c) to make a comfy bed
d) to find prey
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. (d) Dogs react to territorial incursions by chasing the invader
2. (d) A dog's tail wag can mean many different things, depending on the tail's position and the speed at which it's moving
3. (c) Dogs with separation anxiety may urine-mark because they are nervous, but they aren't capable of complex emotions such as spite
4. (a) A dog's normal temperature ranges from `100 degrees F to 102.5 degrees F
5. (d) Whiskers enhance a dog's senses of sight and touch by detecting air currents, sensing obstacles that might otherwise go unseen in the dark and transmitting information about an object's shape and texture
6. (d) All dog's, even hairless breeds, have allergens in their dander (dead skin cells), saliva and urine
7. (c) &
8. (d) A trill is more often attributed to cats
9. (b) The only planting dog's do is of bones
Weird News
No. 1 health concern
Portland, Oregon ------- Portland is flushing 38 million gallons of drinking water down the drain because a 19-year-old man urinated in an open reservoir, city water officials said.
Three teens were observed at the reservoir in a Portland park early in the morning, Portland Water Bureau spokesman David Shaff said, and one of them was filmed urinating through an iron fence into the water.
The 50-million-gallon reservoir was taken off line and was tested for possible contamination. But in the meantime, the city has decided to "discard" 38 million gallons of water and clean the reservoir, Shaff said.
Flashers are such a drag
Pittsburgh ------ A western Pennsylvania police officer said he spent much of December and January dressed as an Amish woman in hopes of scaring off a man suspected of exposing himself to Amish children.
Pulaski Township Sgt. Chad Adams said police weren't able to charge the man because of a lack of evidence.
But Adams said the flasher hasn't been seen in Pulaski, in Lawrence County, since around the same time a man was sentenced to house arrest in January for similar behavior in neighboring Mercer County.
"Sometimes being a police officer means going undercover and doing what you have to do to catch the bad guy," Adams wrote in a caption for a photo showing him in a blue dress, black cloak and bonnet.
We are .............naked
State College, Pa. --------- Penn State police said three male students who reportedly posed nude for a photo at the university's Nittany Lion Shrine face school discipline.
Police told the Centre Daily Times that they responded to the shrine about after an employee reported seeing three naked people.
Police arrived to find three fully clothed male students who were leaving the shrine, but then acknowledged taking the nude photo.
Big gulp
Charleston, S.C. ----------- A man who faced a $525 fine for refilling an 89-cent drink at a Veterans Affairs hospital apparently will get off with a warning.
When Christopher Lewis of North Charleston, S.C., refilled his drink without paying, a federal police officer gave him a ticket.
Veterans Affairs spokeswoman Tonya C. Lobbestael said after reviewing what happened at the Ralph C. Johnson Center in Charleston that officials decided a warning was sufficient.
Lobbestael said the cafeteria at the center has signs posted in the drink machines indicating the cost of refills. Failing to pay for the refills is considered shoplifting.
Portland, Oregon ------- Portland is flushing 38 million gallons of drinking water down the drain because a 19-year-old man urinated in an open reservoir, city water officials said.
Three teens were observed at the reservoir in a Portland park early in the morning, Portland Water Bureau spokesman David Shaff said, and one of them was filmed urinating through an iron fence into the water.
The 50-million-gallon reservoir was taken off line and was tested for possible contamination. But in the meantime, the city has decided to "discard" 38 million gallons of water and clean the reservoir, Shaff said.
Flashers are such a drag
Pittsburgh ------ A western Pennsylvania police officer said he spent much of December and January dressed as an Amish woman in hopes of scaring off a man suspected of exposing himself to Amish children.
Pulaski Township Sgt. Chad Adams said police weren't able to charge the man because of a lack of evidence.
But Adams said the flasher hasn't been seen in Pulaski, in Lawrence County, since around the same time a man was sentenced to house arrest in January for similar behavior in neighboring Mercer County.
"Sometimes being a police officer means going undercover and doing what you have to do to catch the bad guy," Adams wrote in a caption for a photo showing him in a blue dress, black cloak and bonnet.
We are .............naked
State College, Pa. --------- Penn State police said three male students who reportedly posed nude for a photo at the university's Nittany Lion Shrine face school discipline.
Police told the Centre Daily Times that they responded to the shrine about after an employee reported seeing three naked people.
Police arrived to find three fully clothed male students who were leaving the shrine, but then acknowledged taking the nude photo.
Big gulp
Charleston, S.C. ----------- A man who faced a $525 fine for refilling an 89-cent drink at a Veterans Affairs hospital apparently will get off with a warning.
When Christopher Lewis of North Charleston, S.C., refilled his drink without paying, a federal police officer gave him a ticket.
Veterans Affairs spokeswoman Tonya C. Lobbestael said after reviewing what happened at the Ralph C. Johnson Center in Charleston that officials decided a warning was sufficient.
Lobbestael said the cafeteria at the center has signs posted in the drink machines indicating the cost of refills. Failing to pay for the refills is considered shoplifting.
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Reading into an alarming trend
By Carson Lagreca
Central Bucks West High School
I really love reading. I'm always reading at least one book.
A problem has been paining me for a long, long time: kids in high school just don't read! Not only do they not read, but they also poke fun at kids who do.
Yes, I mean me (on occasion). I like to read between classes in the hall. You can find me leaning against a wall, reading Stephen King or Herman Hesse. I often get told I'm a loser, or a nerd ----- jokingly, of course ----- but there is still some real implication hidden in those taunting remarks.
It really puzzles me why kids don't like to read. In fact, it alarms me. We're the future leaders of this country, and we're ignorant and nearly illiterate.
I think this may be partially due to being forced to read for school. This year, in AP language and composition, we read scarcely captivating and extremely non-enthralling novels such as "The Crucible."
For our summer reading, we were forced to read nonfiction books. The set included a borderline self-help book about brains and learning, which, much to my chagrin, I chose to read. The other options weren't much better ----- a book about portion control (why would any high schooler care about portion control) and a book about cadavers that tried to be funny and came off as insolent.
The worst thing about this is that teachers often have no say in what we're reading. The teachers, at least, should have something to do with what we read.
Bottom line is, we should be able to choose our own books to read. I think this would help begin to foster a love of reading in my peers.
I was always reading as a kid. Childhood, I believe, is where the love of reading begins. If you didn't read as a kid, you probably don't read now.
When I ask my peers what they're reading, they scoff at me or laugh in my face. "Reading? Psh. I don't read."
My internal response is often along these lines: "WHAT?" I just don't get it.
There are books out there for everyone ---- for every taste. Do yourself a favor and go to the library. Check out a book.
I'm sure you won't be disappointed.
Central Bucks West High School
I really love reading. I'm always reading at least one book.
A problem has been paining me for a long, long time: kids in high school just don't read! Not only do they not read, but they also poke fun at kids who do.
Yes, I mean me (on occasion). I like to read between classes in the hall. You can find me leaning against a wall, reading Stephen King or Herman Hesse. I often get told I'm a loser, or a nerd ----- jokingly, of course ----- but there is still some real implication hidden in those taunting remarks.
It really puzzles me why kids don't like to read. In fact, it alarms me. We're the future leaders of this country, and we're ignorant and nearly illiterate.
I think this may be partially due to being forced to read for school. This year, in AP language and composition, we read scarcely captivating and extremely non-enthralling novels such as "The Crucible."
For our summer reading, we were forced to read nonfiction books. The set included a borderline self-help book about brains and learning, which, much to my chagrin, I chose to read. The other options weren't much better ----- a book about portion control (why would any high schooler care about portion control) and a book about cadavers that tried to be funny and came off as insolent.
The worst thing about this is that teachers often have no say in what we're reading. The teachers, at least, should have something to do with what we read.
Bottom line is, we should be able to choose our own books to read. I think this would help begin to foster a love of reading in my peers.
I was always reading as a kid. Childhood, I believe, is where the love of reading begins. If you didn't read as a kid, you probably don't read now.
When I ask my peers what they're reading, they scoff at me or laugh in my face. "Reading? Psh. I don't read."
My internal response is often along these lines: "WHAT?" I just don't get it.
There are books out there for everyone ---- for every taste. Do yourself a favor and go to the library. Check out a book.
I'm sure you won't be disappointed.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Why I finally got ios 7 on my iPhone
By Haley Schwartz
Pennridge High School
I have been a proud owner of an iphone for only a year and half, after my father gifted me the new (at the time) iPhone 5 as a get-well for my wisdom teeth surgery.
I had owned an iPod before I got the phone, so I had an idea of how to work it. I was used to the layout and the functionality of the iPod, so I was happy with how easy it was to adapt to the iPhone.
Guess how happy I was when the ios 7 came out. Here's a hint : I wasn't ecstatic. So I had held out on getting the system update until two Monday nights ago.
I realized it was stupid, on my part, that I hadn't upgraded my phone. As I sat, bored on my couch, I started thinking about my lack of desire to get the upgrade.
I thought I didn't want to allow myself to further conform to the technological lifestyle of so many people; I couldn't let myself be taken over by this need to have the newest upgrade or the newest tablet.
But then I came to the realization we can, as individuals, and as a generation, embrace technology, as well as our past and improve upon ourselves. I realized distancing myself from technological improvements is more of a detriment than an advantage.
Yeah,I may not totally agree with the necessity of Twitter and Facebook, nor do I like that there are 7-year-olds running around with iPads, but I must throw myself to the wolves ... err, to technology. I have to embrace our improvements and not hold myself back as long as I don't lose myself in Flappy Bird and Instagram (even though I have neither of those).
I decided just because I upgrade my phone, it doesn't mean I'm succumbing to the addictive nature of being absorbed by technology.
So, yes, I got the upgrade, but the idea of all this ------ of how fast new technology and products are being created ------- is still scary to me in the sense all this is slowly taking over our lives.
So my phone is up to date ....... yada, yada .... and now I have to get used to another system I have to integrate into my life.
But I am not holding myself back from progress, while still keeping technology (in my life at least) somewhat at bay.
Pennridge High School
I have been a proud owner of an iphone for only a year and half, after my father gifted me the new (at the time) iPhone 5 as a get-well for my wisdom teeth surgery.
I had owned an iPod before I got the phone, so I had an idea of how to work it. I was used to the layout and the functionality of the iPod, so I was happy with how easy it was to adapt to the iPhone.
Guess how happy I was when the ios 7 came out. Here's a hint : I wasn't ecstatic. So I had held out on getting the system update until two Monday nights ago.
I realized it was stupid, on my part, that I hadn't upgraded my phone. As I sat, bored on my couch, I started thinking about my lack of desire to get the upgrade.
I thought I didn't want to allow myself to further conform to the technological lifestyle of so many people; I couldn't let myself be taken over by this need to have the newest upgrade or the newest tablet.
But then I came to the realization we can, as individuals, and as a generation, embrace technology, as well as our past and improve upon ourselves. I realized distancing myself from technological improvements is more of a detriment than an advantage.
Yeah,I may not totally agree with the necessity of Twitter and Facebook, nor do I like that there are 7-year-olds running around with iPads, but I must throw myself to the wolves ... err, to technology. I have to embrace our improvements and not hold myself back as long as I don't lose myself in Flappy Bird and Instagram (even though I have neither of those).
I decided just because I upgrade my phone, it doesn't mean I'm succumbing to the addictive nature of being absorbed by technology.
So, yes, I got the upgrade, but the idea of all this ------ of how fast new technology and products are being created ------- is still scary to me in the sense all this is slowly taking over our lives.
So my phone is up to date ....... yada, yada .... and now I have to get used to another system I have to integrate into my life.
But I am not holding myself back from progress, while still keeping technology (in my life at least) somewhat at bay.
Weird News
For God's sake
New York --- A New York City man claims that a credit reporting agency falsely reported that he had no financial history because his first name is God.
God Gazarov of Brooklyn said in a lawsuit that Equifax has refused to correct its system to recognize his name as legitimate, according to the New York Post. He said an Equifax customer-service representative even suggested that he change his name to resolve the issue. Gazarov, 26, is a Russian native who is named after his grandfather. Gazarov said he has high scores with two other major credit agencies.
What a croc!
Roseville, Calif. ----- Don't shed any tears for a crocodile that was captured wandering outside a pet store at a Northern California shopping mall.
California Fish and Wildlife officials have taken custody of the croc, are feeding it rainbow trout and will likely donate it to a zoo. Police said the crocodile was apparently left outside by someone who didn't want it anymore.
The animal had grown to 4-feet long, and its jaws had been wrapped shut with heavy-duty tape. There was a note identifying it as a Nile crocodile and requesting someone "call rescue." Police said no one was hurt when the animal was picked up with the help of a catch pole typically used to nab stray dogs.
N.C. man should learn to toe the line
Lincolnton, N.C. ------ A North Carolina man who sucked an unwilling woman's toes inside a Wal-Mart has been sentenced to 60 days in jail.
Michael Anthony Brown apologized for his actions during his court appearance. He was convicted of assault, but a judge agreed to subtract the three weeks Brown has spent behind bars from the sentence. Police said Brown, 31, told the victim he was a podiatry student and asked her to try on shoes for him in the shoe department of the Wal-Mart in Lincolnton last month.
Investigators said Brown eventually stuck the woman's foot in his mouth and sucked on her toes, then offered to pay for her groceries after she appeared outraged. Brown was apprehended at his home in Concord and turned over to Lincolnton police.
She tried to weed out bad pot.......... her bad pot
Lufkin, Texas -------- Police in East Texas have arrested a woman after she called them to complain about the quality of the marijuana she had purchased from a dealer.
Lufkin police Sgt. David Casper said an officer went to the home of Evelyn Hamilton, 37, to hear her complaint that the dealer refused to return her money after she objected that the drug was substandard. Casper said she pulled the small amount of marijuana from her bra when the officer asked if she still had it.
She was arrested on a charge of possession of drug paraphernalia. Hamilton said she spent $40 on "seeds and residue." She said she called police when she got no satisfaction from the dealer's family.
New York --- A New York City man claims that a credit reporting agency falsely reported that he had no financial history because his first name is God.
God Gazarov of Brooklyn said in a lawsuit that Equifax has refused to correct its system to recognize his name as legitimate, according to the New York Post. He said an Equifax customer-service representative even suggested that he change his name to resolve the issue. Gazarov, 26, is a Russian native who is named after his grandfather. Gazarov said he has high scores with two other major credit agencies.
What a croc!
Roseville, Calif. ----- Don't shed any tears for a crocodile that was captured wandering outside a pet store at a Northern California shopping mall.
California Fish and Wildlife officials have taken custody of the croc, are feeding it rainbow trout and will likely donate it to a zoo. Police said the crocodile was apparently left outside by someone who didn't want it anymore.
The animal had grown to 4-feet long, and its jaws had been wrapped shut with heavy-duty tape. There was a note identifying it as a Nile crocodile and requesting someone "call rescue." Police said no one was hurt when the animal was picked up with the help of a catch pole typically used to nab stray dogs.
N.C. man should learn to toe the line
Lincolnton, N.C. ------ A North Carolina man who sucked an unwilling woman's toes inside a Wal-Mart has been sentenced to 60 days in jail.
Michael Anthony Brown apologized for his actions during his court appearance. He was convicted of assault, but a judge agreed to subtract the three weeks Brown has spent behind bars from the sentence. Police said Brown, 31, told the victim he was a podiatry student and asked her to try on shoes for him in the shoe department of the Wal-Mart in Lincolnton last month.
Investigators said Brown eventually stuck the woman's foot in his mouth and sucked on her toes, then offered to pay for her groceries after she appeared outraged. Brown was apprehended at his home in Concord and turned over to Lincolnton police.
She tried to weed out bad pot.......... her bad pot
Lufkin, Texas -------- Police in East Texas have arrested a woman after she called them to complain about the quality of the marijuana she had purchased from a dealer.
Lufkin police Sgt. David Casper said an officer went to the home of Evelyn Hamilton, 37, to hear her complaint that the dealer refused to return her money after she objected that the drug was substandard. Casper said she pulled the small amount of marijuana from her bra when the officer asked if she still had it.
She was arrested on a charge of possession of drug paraphernalia. Hamilton said she spent $40 on "seeds and residue." She said she called police when she got no satisfaction from the dealer's family.
F. Y. I.
Quotable
by David Whyte, poet
"Courage is the measure of your heartfelt participation in the world. There is no sincere path a human being can take without breaking his or her heart."
Page Jump
Before he wrote the novel "Jaws," Peter Benchley was a speechwriter for President Lyndon B. Johnson.
First Up
Construction worker hard hats were first specifically invented for workers on the Hoover Dam in 1933.
Over Yonder
Outside North and South America, the only alligators found in the wild are in China.
Point of Origin
The word "PEZ" comes from the German word for peppermint ------ "PfeffErminZ."
Lucky Break
Harrison Ford was a 35-year-old handyman fitting a door for Francis Ford Coppola when a studio executive asked him to read lines with the actress testing for a new film ----- "Star Wars."
by David Whyte, poet
"Courage is the measure of your heartfelt participation in the world. There is no sincere path a human being can take without breaking his or her heart."
Page Jump
Before he wrote the novel "Jaws," Peter Benchley was a speechwriter for President Lyndon B. Johnson.
First Up
Construction worker hard hats were first specifically invented for workers on the Hoover Dam in 1933.
Over Yonder
Outside North and South America, the only alligators found in the wild are in China.
Point of Origin
The word "PEZ" comes from the German word for peppermint ------ "PfeffErminZ."
Lucky Break
Harrison Ford was a 35-year-old handyman fitting a door for Francis Ford Coppola when a studio executive asked him to read lines with the actress testing for a new film ----- "Star Wars."
F. Y. I.
Celebrate This
Today is Cherish an Antique Day.
Quotable
by Lady Gaga
"Love is like a brick. You can build a house, or you can sink a dead body."
Still on the Books
In Massachusetts, mourners at a wake may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Expressive Twitch
More than a dozen separate muscles control a dog's ear movements.,
Lore Has It
In Serbia, spilling water behind a person embarking on a new venture or starting a journey is considered good luck, symbolizing fluidity and motion.
In Brief Bloom
The agave, or century plant, can take as long as 30 years to grow a single bloom, after which it dies.
Today is Cherish an Antique Day.
Quotable
by Lady Gaga
"Love is like a brick. You can build a house, or you can sink a dead body."
Still on the Books
In Massachusetts, mourners at a wake may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Expressive Twitch
More than a dozen separate muscles control a dog's ear movements.,
Lore Has It
In Serbia, spilling water behind a person embarking on a new venture or starting a journey is considered good luck, symbolizing fluidity and motion.
In Brief Bloom
The agave, or century plant, can take as long as 30 years to grow a single bloom, after which it dies.
Sunday, April 6, 2014
What Fools believe
Hilaria was a series of feast days celebrated by the pagan people of Rome. Hilarity and hijinks ensued, and it eventually became known to us as "All Fools Day," observed on April 1.
It was preceded, however, by a day of brutality that included beatings, whippings and castration rites. I guess you'd need a laugh after that.
We moderns continue to pull pranks on those who seem good targets, or who fully deserve to be punked.
Many years ago, I pranked a colleague, a man who was always reminding me he had graduated at the top of his class from a prestigious university. One April Fools' Day, I left two notes on his desk. One was to call "Myra Manes," with the phone number of the county coroner. The second was "Call Mr. Fox" with the number to the Philadelphia Zoo.
Oldies but goodies.
He called both, one then the other. His face reddened after the second call. Which is when I learned that tuition paid to a big-name university does not buy a sense of humor. He chased me through the newsroom, grabbing things from desks and throwing them at me after he was told there was no "Mr. Fox" (or "Ella Fint" or "Anna Conda") at the zoo.
There has never been a shortage of fools : people who think 9/11 was an inside job, that casino slot machines are a sound financial investment, who know their astrological sign but not their blood type.
However, it seems to me that the population of fools has increased exponentially over the last few decades, as we approach $20 trillion in debt and seem to believe everything is going to be fine. So, here is a partial list of items the which common Boobis Americanus believes.
Freedom isn't free, but food stamps are.
Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country can do to give you more free stuff.
You can be fiscally conservative, but socially liberal. You know, because the feds can print funny money to pay for all those liberal social programs that fiscal conservatives will never cut.
Get inept, inefficient government out of Pennsylvania Liquor sales, but put inept, inefficient government in charge of health care.
If you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor.
Fixing "income inequality" is the key to social justice. When we all make $40,000 a year, travel by mass transit, live in similar cramped abodes in cities, dress in similar hemp clothing while self-medicating with "medical" marijuana, paradise is ours.
Smart Cars are smart, especially when driving on highways loaded with hulking SUVs.
Global warming is due to humans burning fossil fuels. It is not connected in any way to that large, 20 million degree ball of fire in the sky.
Dogs are people, too.
So are cats, squirrels, Canada geese and polar bears.
But not cockroaches, spiders or stink bugs. Squish 'em.
What this country needs is another Bush in the White House..
Hillary will win the White House because her ideas are better.
Why, yes, people over 50 can look "hot."
No one will know it's a toupee, Botox or hair dye.
Tattoos improve the natural beauty of one's skin, especially if the tats are of colorful cartoon characters or something scary/edgy. What shoulder-blade is not improved when embazoned with a skull that has flames coming from its eyes?
All you need is love.
And birth control.
If the love is infectious, penicillin.
It was preceded, however, by a day of brutality that included beatings, whippings and castration rites. I guess you'd need a laugh after that.
We moderns continue to pull pranks on those who seem good targets, or who fully deserve to be punked.
Many years ago, I pranked a colleague, a man who was always reminding me he had graduated at the top of his class from a prestigious university. One April Fools' Day, I left two notes on his desk. One was to call "Myra Manes," with the phone number of the county coroner. The second was "Call Mr. Fox" with the number to the Philadelphia Zoo.
Oldies but goodies.
He called both, one then the other. His face reddened after the second call. Which is when I learned that tuition paid to a big-name university does not buy a sense of humor. He chased me through the newsroom, grabbing things from desks and throwing them at me after he was told there was no "Mr. Fox" (or "Ella Fint" or "Anna Conda") at the zoo.
There has never been a shortage of fools : people who think 9/11 was an inside job, that casino slot machines are a sound financial investment, who know their astrological sign but not their blood type.
However, it seems to me that the population of fools has increased exponentially over the last few decades, as we approach $20 trillion in debt and seem to believe everything is going to be fine. So, here is a partial list of items the which common Boobis Americanus believes.
Freedom isn't free, but food stamps are.
Ask not what you can do for your country, but what your country can do to give you more free stuff.
You can be fiscally conservative, but socially liberal. You know, because the feds can print funny money to pay for all those liberal social programs that fiscal conservatives will never cut.
Get inept, inefficient government out of Pennsylvania Liquor sales, but put inept, inefficient government in charge of health care.
If you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor.
Fixing "income inequality" is the key to social justice. When we all make $40,000 a year, travel by mass transit, live in similar cramped abodes in cities, dress in similar hemp clothing while self-medicating with "medical" marijuana, paradise is ours.
Smart Cars are smart, especially when driving on highways loaded with hulking SUVs.
Global warming is due to humans burning fossil fuels. It is not connected in any way to that large, 20 million degree ball of fire in the sky.
Dogs are people, too.
So are cats, squirrels, Canada geese and polar bears.
But not cockroaches, spiders or stink bugs. Squish 'em.
What this country needs is another Bush in the White House..
Hillary will win the White House because her ideas are better.
Why, yes, people over 50 can look "hot."
No one will know it's a toupee, Botox or hair dye.
Tattoos improve the natural beauty of one's skin, especially if the tats are of colorful cartoon characters or something scary/edgy. What shoulder-blade is not improved when embazoned with a skull that has flames coming from its eyes?
All you need is love.
And birth control.
If the love is infectious, penicillin.
Weird letters & advice
Tuesday, April 1st - April Fools!
Dear Readers : It's April Fools' Day, the one day I can share some unique letters ---------- clearly, more than a few written in an attempt to have some fun with me. Enjoy!
Dear Abby : Many times when I would wake up in the morning, I'd find toothpaste already on my toothbrush, courtesy of my foreign-born girlfriend, "Inger." Because I am chivalrous, I figured I would return the favor. So at night before going to bed or in the morning, I'd tiptoe to the bathroom and put toothpaste on her toothbrush.
Well, the other day Inger told me, "Don't put toothpaste on my toothbrush!" I was flabbergasted. And if that's not enough, she no longer preps my toothbrush either.
I know, I know -------------- I should have asked a simple "Why?" but I wasn't in the mood for drama. Now it's eating at me and I just don't get it.
Confused in Connecticut
Dear Confused : I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but here it is : Inger appears to be giving you the brush-off.
Dear Abby : I have this really hot, sexy latex dress in lilac. I can't decide which color 6-inch stilettos to wear with it, black or white. I don't want to look trashy.
Fashionista in the East
Dear Fashionista : With latex in April, wear flats and a long overcoat.
Dear Abby : All the letters you have printed about pennies brought back the memories of what happened in our family when I was very small. My mother won a $10 gold piece for her sponge cake, but our family dog swallowed the coin.
You are probably wondering if we got the coin back. No, we didn't. Turned out the coin was counterfeit, and the dog couldn't "pass it."
Gotcha! in Amherst, Ohio
Dear Gotcha! Now that's a shaggy dog story if I ever heard one. (And for a moment, I swallowed it.)
Dear Readers : It's April Fools' Day, the one day I can share some unique letters ---------- clearly, more than a few written in an attempt to have some fun with me. Enjoy!
Dear Abby : Many times when I would wake up in the morning, I'd find toothpaste already on my toothbrush, courtesy of my foreign-born girlfriend, "Inger." Because I am chivalrous, I figured I would return the favor. So at night before going to bed or in the morning, I'd tiptoe to the bathroom and put toothpaste on her toothbrush.
Well, the other day Inger told me, "Don't put toothpaste on my toothbrush!" I was flabbergasted. And if that's not enough, she no longer preps my toothbrush either.
I know, I know -------------- I should have asked a simple "Why?" but I wasn't in the mood for drama. Now it's eating at me and I just don't get it.
Confused in Connecticut
Dear Confused : I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but here it is : Inger appears to be giving you the brush-off.
Dear Abby : I have this really hot, sexy latex dress in lilac. I can't decide which color 6-inch stilettos to wear with it, black or white. I don't want to look trashy.
Fashionista in the East
Dear Fashionista : With latex in April, wear flats and a long overcoat.
Dear Abby : All the letters you have printed about pennies brought back the memories of what happened in our family when I was very small. My mother won a $10 gold piece for her sponge cake, but our family dog swallowed the coin.
You are probably wondering if we got the coin back. No, we didn't. Turned out the coin was counterfeit, and the dog couldn't "pass it."
Gotcha! in Amherst, Ohio
Dear Gotcha! Now that's a shaggy dog story if I ever heard one. (And for a moment, I swallowed it.)
F. Y. I.
Celebrate This
Tuesday April 1, is not only April Fools' Day, but National One Cent Day and National Sourdough Bread Day.
Point of Origin
April Fools' reportedly originated in 16th-century France, when Pope Gregory XIII mandated the new year begin on Jan. 1 instead of April 1; those who failed to follow the new calendar were dubbed "April fools."
Quotable
by W.C. Fields, American actor and comedian (1880-1946)
"If at first you don't succeed, try again. No use being a damn fool about it."
Save the Date
Press releases for the (non-existent) New York City April Fools' Day Parade have been issued every year since 1986.
Keeping Time
In 1980, the British Broadcasting Corp. (BBC) was inundated with protests when, as an April Fools' joke, it announced the clock faces on London landmark Big-Ben would be replaced with digital displays to keep up with modern technology.
Tuesday April 1, is not only April Fools' Day, but National One Cent Day and National Sourdough Bread Day.
Point of Origin
April Fools' reportedly originated in 16th-century France, when Pope Gregory XIII mandated the new year begin on Jan. 1 instead of April 1; those who failed to follow the new calendar were dubbed "April fools."
Quotable
by W.C. Fields, American actor and comedian (1880-1946)
"If at first you don't succeed, try again. No use being a damn fool about it."
Save the Date
Press releases for the (non-existent) New York City April Fools' Day Parade have been issued every year since 1986.
Keeping Time
In 1980, the British Broadcasting Corp. (BBC) was inundated with protests when, as an April Fools' joke, it announced the clock faces on London landmark Big-Ben would be replaced with digital displays to keep up with modern technology.
Kennections
All five correct answers have something in common.
Can you figure out what it is ?
1. Which of TV's Friends was the identical twin of Ursula Buffay, a character on Mad About You?
2. What cousin of the ostrich is South America's largest flightless bird?
3. In 1585, a Flemish engraver named Gerardus Mercator published the first book of maps called what?
4. What 2012 science fiction movie was Ridley Scott's loose prequel to his first hit, Alien?
5. What speedy NFL running back do fans call "CJ2K"?
Bonus : What's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Phoebe
2. Rhea
3. Atlas
4. Prometheus
5. Chris Johnson
Bonus : All are Titans
Can you figure out what it is ?
1. Which of TV's Friends was the identical twin of Ursula Buffay, a character on Mad About You?
2. What cousin of the ostrich is South America's largest flightless bird?
3. In 1585, a Flemish engraver named Gerardus Mercator published the first book of maps called what?
4. What 2012 science fiction movie was Ridley Scott's loose prequel to his first hit, Alien?
5. What speedy NFL running back do fans call "CJ2K"?
Bonus : What's the "Kennection" between all five answers?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Answers : 1. Phoebe
2. Rhea
3. Atlas
4. Prometheus
5. Chris Johnson
Bonus : All are Titans
Weird News
Justifying that $4 ATM service fee
A malfunctioning ATM at a bank in Maine has dispensed $37,000 in cash to man who requested $140.
South Portland police say they responded to the TD Bank branch Thursday morning after getting a call from a woman who said a man spending an unusual amount of time at the ATM she was waiting to use. Officers found the man stuffing cash into a shopping bag.
The money was returned to the bank. Bank officials say they don't want to press charges, but police continue to investigate. The man hasn't been charged.
Mom, can Satan come over to play?
Warsaw, Poland ----------- A Roman Catholic priest has touched off a controversy in Poland after news media quoted him describing toys like LEGO's Monster Fighters as tools of Satan that lead children to the "dark side".
The Super Express tabloid quoted the Rev. Slawomir Kostrzewa urging parents to dump the LEGO series and those of several other firms. The remarks at a Sunday service in the town of Wolsztyn touched off discussion in predominantly Catholic Poland, which holds priests in high esteem.
In remarks Friday to The Associated Press, Kostrzewa denied having referred to Satan, but insists the toys are scary, undermining harmony and security.
Putin denied the chance to supersize
Buffalo, N.Y. ------------- Hey Putin, don't even think about ordering a Super Mighty in Buffalo.
Mighty Taco, a Buffalo-based chain of Mexican fast-food restaurants, has banned Russian President Vladimir Putin from all of the company's 23 locations in western New York.
The company known for its quirky ads announced on social media this week that effective immediately, Putin is banned from Mighty Taco for seizing Crimea from Ukraine. Mighty Taco's posting says Putin may be ordering around Crimea, but he won't be ordering a Super Mighty.
The posting, which features a red-tinted photo of a gesticulating Putin, says he'll be "welcomed back" at Mighty Taco when he stops acting like a bully and "picking on people".
Rolling out the yoga mats on Capitol Hill
Moscow ------------------- A senior Russian diplomat says U.S. officials should do yoga and watch TV comedy series to ease what he calls their irrational fixation on punishing Russia over Ukraine.
Deputy Foreign Minister Sergei Ryabkov's comments to the Interfax news agency Thursday reflected simmering tensions between Moscow and Washington over Russia's annexation of Crimea.
Ryabkov said the U.S. got "fixated" on halting cooperation with Russia. He said his "advice to the U.S. partners is to spend more time outdoors, do yoga ......and watch TV comedy series" instead of "childish whims, tears and hysterics that won't help."
A malfunctioning ATM at a bank in Maine has dispensed $37,000 in cash to man who requested $140.
South Portland police say they responded to the TD Bank branch Thursday morning after getting a call from a woman who said a man spending an unusual amount of time at the ATM she was waiting to use. Officers found the man stuffing cash into a shopping bag.
The money was returned to the bank. Bank officials say they don't want to press charges, but police continue to investigate. The man hasn't been charged.
Mom, can Satan come over to play?
Warsaw, Poland ----------- A Roman Catholic priest has touched off a controversy in Poland after news media quoted him describing toys like LEGO's Monster Fighters as tools of Satan that lead children to the "dark side".
The Super Express tabloid quoted the Rev. Slawomir Kostrzewa urging parents to dump the LEGO series and those of several other firms. The remarks at a Sunday service in the town of Wolsztyn touched off discussion in predominantly Catholic Poland, which holds priests in high esteem.
In remarks Friday to The Associated Press, Kostrzewa denied having referred to Satan, but insists the toys are scary, undermining harmony and security.
Putin denied the chance to supersize
Buffalo, N.Y. ------------- Hey Putin, don't even think about ordering a Super Mighty in Buffalo.
Mighty Taco, a Buffalo-based chain of Mexican fast-food restaurants, has banned Russian President Vladimir Putin from all of the company's 23 locations in western New York.
The company known for its quirky ads announced on social media this week that effective immediately, Putin is banned from Mighty Taco for seizing Crimea from Ukraine. Mighty Taco's posting says Putin may be ordering around Crimea, but he won't be ordering a Super Mighty.
The posting, which features a red-tinted photo of a gesticulating Putin, says he'll be "welcomed back" at Mighty Taco when he stops acting like a bully and "picking on people".
Rolling out the yoga mats on Capitol Hill
Moscow ------------------- A senior Russian diplomat says U.S. officials should do yoga and watch TV comedy series to ease what he calls their irrational fixation on punishing Russia over Ukraine.
Deputy Foreign Minister Sergei Ryabkov's comments to the Interfax news agency Thursday reflected simmering tensions between Moscow and Washington over Russia's annexation of Crimea.
Ryabkov said the U.S. got "fixated" on halting cooperation with Russia. He said his "advice to the U.S. partners is to spend more time outdoors, do yoga ......and watch TV comedy series" instead of "childish whims, tears and hysterics that won't help."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)