BALD HEAD COVERED IN NEWSPRINT FIRST CLUE MAN FORGOT UMBRELLA

A legible New York Times headline on bald man hairless scalp was the most obvious hint he'd misplaced his umbrella during a rain storm. "I was hoping people wouldn't notice," the bald man said of his soaked entrance to work. "But when I sat down everyone came over to ask if I knew about the GM Bankruptcy like real wiseguys. They said it looked like it was on my mind. Hardy Har Har. "The bald man finally learned of the embarassing situation when he went to towel off in the men's room. He considered hiding in the handicapped stall until lunch and regretted not following through when he found half a dozen hats piled on his chair along with a USA Today newspaper labeled as "casual wear".